Thursday, January 21, 2010

surrender




"The dream of my life
Is to lie down by a slow river
And to stare at the light in the trees -
To learn something by being nothing
A little while but the rich
Lens of attention."

Mary Oliver

After dancing and filming daily for a year for YearOfButoh in 2009, I came to realize that even days when there is little inspiration to dance, there is still opportunity to dance. After several days of longing for stillness in my busy life, I finally surrendered - not really by choice, but with the symptoms of a cold firmly lodged in my being.

My dance practice today took me outdoors with the opportunity to visit familiar places in the garden from a new perspective, inspired by Momo's teachings. I imagine I am not alone when I desire for the opportunity to stay home more and work less so that there is time just to be in our homes - to rest, to enjoy what we work so hard for, to have the luxury of time to extend gratitude out in an unhurried way for all the beauty that is in the simple and ordinary experiences of our lives, and not to read, do laundry or do things - but, simply be... Up early to make hot lemon, how beautiful the opportunity to witness the dancing shadows from the pine tree in our yard on the living room wall from the light of the streetlight... time to experience sacred in the ordinary, often overlooked moments.

I often find it ironic that when I have time to be at home and NOT be busy, is when I HAVE to be home because of illness - time, but lacking energy and vitality...

However, grateful to spend time in the garden today regardless of physical symptoms... Feeling drawn to the rock 'rivers' in our yard longing to become one with the landscapes, smelling the earth, the decaying leaves and being eye to eye with the uprising spring shoots... I was also reminded of where we come from and where we are going to and how everything becomes everything else eventually from this lying down practice. Gratitude for life...



"I thought the earth
remembered me, she
took me back so tenderly, arranging
her dark skirts, her pockets
full of lichens and seeds. I slept
as never before, a stone
on the riverbed, nothing
between me and the white fire of the stars
but my thoughts, and they floated
like moths among the branches of the perfect trees."

Mary Oliver
video
Visit my butoh mentor's beautiful blog here: Maureen 'Momo' Freehill

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